Some Random Thoughts and Ramblings

I’m now under 240 lbs, and am at the lowest weight I’ve been at in over 10 years. I haven’t seen this number on the scale in a very, very long time. I think I can honestly say that, had I not been attending my weekly Weight Watchers meetings, I would have probably given up by now, and would not have made it this far. My Wednesday night meeting group, and our fearless leader Melanie really have kept me motivated and encouraged along the way. So, they all deserve a huge Bravo!

My weight loss has also done wonders for my self-esteem. While I still have a long way to go before I reach my ultimate goal weight, losing close to 40 lbs in the past 6 months (35.4 on Weight Watchers, plus 5 lbs in November, before I joined) has made a big difference in how I feel about myself. Major confession time – my new theme song lately has been “Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?” I’m feeling better about myself now than I have in a long time. Not just in terms of my appearance, but also in terms of what I can do now that I couldn’t do before. I used to get tired and out of breath just walking home from the bus stop. Now, I can walk over a mile or two without that happening. I can run up the subway stairs if I want (not that I want to all that often). Overall, I’ve got more energy and stamina. I don’t have to hoist myself off a couch or chair. Clothes that used to be snug on me are now loose.

The biggest thing is that I no longer feel like the fattest person in the room. That alone is a pretty incredible feeling.

One Winning Outcome Down…

Since sometime around December, I’ve had my initial Winning Outcome and storyboard posted on my refrigerator door. The Winning Outcome was to be “Down 40 for Fearless” – in other words, to lose 40 lbs for the Omega Institute’s annual “Being Fearless” conference that I volunteer at every year (except last year, when I ended up in the hospital). My storyboard listed certain things I needed to do in order to get there. Things like drinking water every day, walking 5-10 miles a week, choosing the fat-free alternative, and moving more every day. On the whole, I did pretty well with them, and it paid off.

The conference was last weekend. While I was a few pounds shy of the original 40 lb goal, I was within 5 lbs of it, so I consider myself a huge success. I’ve lost just 31.4 lbs since joining Weight Watchers, plus another 5 lbs prior to joining, so I was really close. Keep in mind, also, that most of the people I saw at the conference hadn’t seen me in about 2 years, at which point I weighed about 15 lbs more than I did in October 2007 – I just wasn’t keeping track of the loss, as I wasn’t trying to lose back then. So, I’m actually closer to 50 lbs lighter than I was at the April 2006 conference.

And boy, did people notice! Some people didn’t recognize me at first, and others told me how fantastic I looked. I ate it all up and enjoyed every minute of it. I was assigned to James Van Praagh’s all-day workshop as a mic runner, and boy did I get a workout! I know last year I never would’ve been able to run from one end of a huge hotel ballroom to another the way I did. But I did, and it felt great!

Now, I have to figure out my next Winning Outcome. My 45th birthday is in July, so I could make it “25 by 45″, and aim for another 25 lbs down by mid-July. Not quite sure I want to do that, though. I’ll have to think about it.